BRILLIANT. As you recall, I struggled with my new biker babe/bitch status at the Hooter's Bike Night. It wasn't pretty.
But now. Now I'm a bowling bitch. I am a member of the R&C team in the Thursday Night Powder Puff League. YEAH baby! My team is great. I already set the team motto and they welcomed it with open arms "Set the bar low." Yeah, you heard me...then it can only go up from there! I set my bar at 75. I bowled a 93, a 111 and a 108. See! See how well my strategy works! Not bad for my first night using a house ball and wearing someone else's shoes. I'll take it! My team is Ryan, Dawn, Misty and Chrissy. Several one-liners came out of the evening like:
"It's all about the beer" (in reference to Chrissy's game falling after she switched to diet pepsi, and then her game picking up when she got another beer)
"You got this. Do it just like we practiced!" (what I shouted to Misty when she was looking at a 7-10 split.)
"No premature cheering"
This last one is very important. It ruins your bowling karma. I saw several spares go awry because of premature cheering. Just because they look good going down doesn't mean you should shout about it. Not until the pins fall, baby.
I didn't get hollered at by anyone, so apparently my bowling etiquette was fine. Either that or they were taking it easy on the new girl. Ryan's mother-in-law was with us and warned us that we have to pay attention to who is up when. I guess some teams get really crunchy with you if you're not paying attention and that little arrow on the scoreboard flashes under your name too long. Because socializing is not more important than bowling. It's not.
I also need to buy a deck of naked boy cards if I want to fit in. Boys with inappropriately large and rather scary looking penises. There was a deck on every table.
Basically, they drink, they cuss, they talk too loud, they say inappropriate things, buy 50-50 tickets and love to eat. So I now have 4 new supergay best friends. Why oh why haven't I done this before??
HAPPY BIRTHDAY UNCLE DUG-O!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHAE!!!
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5 comments:
Boob talk and penis talk? I may need to setup a proxy filter at home.
Well, not in the same post, Scottish!!!
It sounds like your team is just like mine. You have a drinking team with a bowling problem. (Between 4 or 5 of us (depending if John Campaniello shows since he can't bowl) we usually go through 4 pitchers during the 3 games...)
One other tip. You have to be mindful of the people you are bowling next to. At no time should there be two bowlers standing next to eachother bowling at the same time. You just don't do it. Like, if you're on Lane 4 and the person is up on Lane 5 you do not step up until the Lane 5 has thrown the ball and returned to the scoring area.
Also, always remember, spare before a strike. That's good bowling ettiquet...(I can't spell.)
The not standing next to someone part I knew - I tried to be mindful because some of those ladies looked like they could get M.E.A.N. and I didn't want to cry on my first night.
It's hot in my office.
I love lamp.
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