Are you done shopping???

I'm looking at YOU, Jimmer. Well? Have you finished? The Kev-head wrapped all my presents and put them under the tree last night...there's quite a lot of them! Very exciting! It's taking every ounce of Christmas spirit I can muster to not check the mastercard online to see where he's been shopping. It's.killing.me.

Were you naughty or nice this year? Give all the details...use all the bad words.

I think mostly I was nice. Wasn't I? I don't think I can call myself naughty - there were definitely times when I was NOT nice - but naughty? Hmmmmm...

naugh·ty
1. disobedient; mischievous (used esp. in speaking to or about children): Weren't we naughty not to eat our spinach?
2. improper, tasteless, indecorous, or indecent: a naughty word.
3. Obsolete. wicked; evil.

Disobedient? Huh. I guess it depends who you're asking. If you're asking me, I'd say no. If you ask the Kev-head - he'd probably say I've had my moments. HA!

Mischievous? Well, yeah...that sounds like me. "playfully annoying" - it's like Webster's met me! Some might say I'm just the annoying part - well then I wouldn't be mischievous and therefore not naughty. So there. It's that playful part that gets me in trouble! Damn my golden retriever ways! ( I took one of those DISC, SELF whatever personality studies once - it said I was most like a golden retriever...I've never gotten over it. Well, they do have great hair!)

Improper? Tasteless? Indecorous? Indecent? Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes/No. Like I haven't been exposing myself or anything, but I have been vulgar, and maybe even rude....DEFINITELY vulgar. Shocking, I know.

Good thing that wicked and evil part are obsolete - I mean, I saw Wicked this year? Does that count? Okay, that was stupid. It's early...I've already eaten a plate of food that could feed a small third world country. I'm a little loopy this morning. But we get to leave at 3 today...hooray!

Anyway, I think given some review, I guess I have been naughty this year - just not in THAT way. Geez...pervs. I've been naughty by very definition. Can I just say I've been both naughty AND nice? Do they offset each other and make me neutral somehow? Or have I been nice enough to erase some of the naughty? Does my work with the church offset my vulgar (and perpetual) use of profanity? Does my work with the cub scouts offset my improperly loud belching around the house? Does my blog therapy offset the mischievous torturing of my children with Saturday morning disco music and never-ending teasing? (and it is MIS-che-vus, NOT mis-CHEE-vee-us, just so you know)

So I guess I haven't decided anything. Maybe I've been the perfect mix of naughty AND nice this year. Doesn't really matter - I still got presents! Chick-chick-boom! MRA3=DORK.