Oh me oh my-o ... usually I'm here rambling about my youngest child ...but today, today I have things I simply MUST get off my chest about the oldest. Dear Lord. Now those of you that know him know him as the shy quiet type...doesn't say much...lurks about...and then crawls off to watch tv/read a book/play video games. But some of you have had the rare opportunity to actually interact with the child, and he is quite funny (see mooya's blog).
He's a very bright boy - he really is. Great story teller, loves to read, great memory when it comes to well, useless information. And this is where he is just.like.his.mother. That bitch. She can't remember a damn thing! Would lose her head if it wasn't attached. You can tell her something and 5 seconds later she will forget to do it. It's why the lazy sack relies on email. Oh sure! She can remember obsure lines from cult classic films...and she can tell you everything she's eaten for lunch in the past 3 months, and heaven forbid she forget the name of a good wine...NEVER! But ask her if she can remember to pick up dog food/cat food/toilet paper/something for dinner...not so much. Brilliant.
So Alex is just like me in this regard. Poor bastard. Never had a chance and never saw it coming. As you recall, fabulous NYC trip ended with Pittsburgh for Gram's 90th. And of course, being a family event, we had to bring the kids. And the kids had to be entertained. So they checked out library books. And actually read them! But when we go to pack up the car, Alex isn't sure where his book is...Kevin thinks he put it in the "entertainment bag." (which if we DIDN'T bring the kids conjures up all sorts of images...but since we DID...it's just a duffle bag full of video games, movies, books, etc. Dirty minded souls.) So we leave the Bentleyville Best Western and head for home.
Flash forward to Monday - when I was in my funk - remember that? Yeah, Alex picks THAT day, one week after we've been home to ask me if I ever found his library book. Ummmmm, what? It's been a week and you're just now asking? I assumed that when you didn't ask again after we left PA that you had found it. No. and it's due when? Wednesday. Brilliant. So I call the Best Western and sure enough, they've got it. Luckily my uncle drives all over delivering precriptions to the elderly and shut in, so he was able to pick it up. You don't ask until a WEEK later?
I wouldn't be telling you about this except...
Last night was Christmas shopping night. In order to save on driving and time, we didn't go home first - we made arrangements for Owen, grabbed Al and stayed up north. He went with us to a few stores, mostly we just told him not to be near us so he wouldn't see anything and we left it at that. Then he got bored so we dropped him at Barnes & Noble for some soda and a magazine. He's very happy with this plan. We leave him with money and a phone so he can contact us if need be.
We finish our shopping and we're heading back to B&N - Kevin first direct connects Alex on my phone. He's not answering. So I say - he probably doesn't know what to do with that - you should call him. So he does. No answer. Ummm, Al? By now we're approaching the B&N...as we drive by, I can see him in the windoww, sitting there, reading a magazine. Why aren't you answering the phone???
Kevin goes in and as soon as he hits the door he can hear the Nextel alert going off. As he gets closer to Alex, he confirms that yes it is, in fact, my phone in ALEX'S POCKET going off. Kevin says "Alex - why aren't you answering the phone? Can you not hear that?"
"Yeah, oh...that was me? I thought it was somebody else's phone"
OMG. It's been going off since we left the mall. Everyone in the place was probably ready to KILL him...and he doesn't even think to CHECK to see if it's the phone in his pocket making noise. Heaven help me.
There's another bonehead stunt that's recent, too, but I can't think of it right now. I'll let you know when I do.
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4 comments:
Alex's book - put it in the mail this morning.
Alex isn't the only one who is clueless when it comes to cell phones, Rich always thinks his cell is ringing when it's someone else's....then when his really is ringing, he often doesn't answer it....very annoying.
Just got my first cell phone last week and am still learning to use it. Day one - left the ringer off the whole day. Day two - left it at home being charged. Day three - left it in my purse as I went from meeting to meeting, so it was useless. Day four - Forgot to lock the keys and repeatedly whipped my purse around all day, accidentally calling my husband's friend ANDY (first on the contact list) until I saw an email from him that said STOP CALLING ME!
So, yeah, I can relate to Alex.
Eileen - OMG - are you serious...that is hilarious!!!
Killing me - your FIRST cell phone??? I don't even understand the words coming out of your typing hands...
Yeah, Craig and I had watched too many Little House on the Prairies with the kids and we thought we were some frontier family that didn't need the technology of the current world. He almost bought a fiddle.
But, alas, Natty's school needed to get a hold of me and I didn't have a cell phone. What did Ma Ingalls ever do when THAT happened?
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