Unable to grasp the concept that I may have just spent $85 on two bras that are essentially torture devices, I'm trying again. Today I am wearing one of the new, fabulous potentially pain causing bras. Because, hey - I'm all about the research, man. Let's test the theory and see what happens tomorrow. I'm doing it all for you guys. Well, that and to further my studies into my Google medical degree. Because I have one you know. I can diagnose ANYONE in three clicks. I'm brilliant. BRILLIANT I say. Just look at the certificate on my wall. That's it...I'm getting a stethoscope and a lab coat so people will take me more seriouser.
In other news that doesn't involve my boobs - is anyone watching Rockstar?? Seriously, it's a trainwreck. I think Tommy Lee hired a writer for his one-liner comments...He's saying things like "You're raising the bar, and I'm pulling up a barstool"...that is craptastic right there, I don't care who ya'are.
Owen is playing on the Roselawn all-star team for a tournament in Cedar Lake. And get this. The boy is PITCHING, yo! I'm ready to go into cardiac arrest over this. There's so much pressure! To be the pitcher! When it's your first year! And you can tell how frantic I am by the number of exclamation points I'm using! I'm on FIRE over here with worry! One of the other moms promised to bring me a paper bag to breathe into. I wish I had a working video camera. I think I do. But I don't want to add to the pressure!
Jen suggested I slam a shot before the game. Yeah, um, THERE'S good advice. Because that's a pretty picture...me, screaming and cheering and reeking of tequila at the little league all-star tournament. YEAH baby! Exxcshuse me, Mr. ooooompire...i think that waszh a shtrike. Toss in a muscle relaxer and I'm SET! Game time tonight - 8pm. Tomorrow 6pm. Owen can pitch a max of 4 innings each game. That's a lot of balls, loveys!
Alex is down for the count in Anderson with swimmer's ear. Seriously down. Like sleeping 12 hours and taking tylenol with codeine to manage the pain. That's the same water that leveled our dear sweet Julia Goolia for an entire day of fabulous beach vacay. Gotta love Lake Michigan. And to think, we all just ate perch Kevin pulled out of that very lake just a week before. Maybe that's why I've been stricken with a lower GI thing. Lake Michigan is slowly killing us all. Damn e coli.
Think good thoughts for my boys - they could both use it.
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8 comments:
Just a couple of comments here.
1) First Julie is a dentist and now you're a doctor? What the shit? Did you both stay at a Holiday Inn Express or what?
2) I'm still baffled by Owen being a pitcher. He doesn't know how to pitch which, if he's throwing incorrectly, could damage his arm. (Although, he would probably always have a shot with the Cubs.) Rebecca, if you would like me to work with him and teach him proper mechanics, I would be happy to do that. Just bring (her old bones down here and we'll dig up your daughter - get it?) him to Porter County and I'll spend a couple hours with him while you and Julie get boozed up....I pitched for 9 years you know...
Mr. All Star!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OF COURSE I'm a doctor! You didn't know? I need that lab coat and stethoscope more than ever.
I don't know enough to say whether Owen's technique is good or bad. What are you doing tonight, Jimmer? They play at 6pm in Cedar Lake. They are starting another pitcher, but plan to use Owen to clean up. You should come out and assess him.
Janet said he slept for 10 hours and his arm isn't hurting him. I had her give him an ibuprofen last night just in case and he's drinking lots of water and sports water today so his muscles stay loose.
??? 3 more games to go.
Well, as long as he's not trying to throw any junk, he'll be fine. It's just hard to correct technique if he's already in a pattern.
With 3 more games he'll be fine and I'd be willing to work with him in the off season.
Are you and Kevin building a pitching mound for him???? It won't cost much...
I'll send you specs...
I hadn't thought about building a pitching mound, but I guess we could.
He's not trying to do anything except get it over the plate and make it swingable. So I'm not sure what you mean by "junk."
After last night's game Kevin said "I thought Owen was going to be a good little infielder, but after this, maybe we should look into some pitching clinics in the off season."
OK, I am going to have to come to a game if all this fun drinking is happening. I don't remember Liberty Rec being this way... then again, I was a kid and wouldn't have noticed.
Still no word on whether Alex's script comes with a refil...
Nice Ferris reference Jimmer
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