Memories, like the corners of my mind...

Misty water colored memories
of the way we were....

Remember how it used to be...remember how I used to type stupid shit and occasionally someone would respond...and then people would respond to that..and so on, and so on...

What is going on out there people? Do I offend?? (see Ducky in Pretty in Pink.) Am I talking to myself these days? I know Kathy's reading, because she tells me here in the office. But where are the rest of you???

Wait, what was I talking about? Oh, yeah, memory. I don't have one. Now I can still out-remember my husband and occasionally my boss (though not-so-much anymore, and that's concerning him, because as he says..."You're the one with the memory, reb pak, I rely on you for this." Which makes it increasingly painful when he asks me something and my answer is "I don't remember." What is my purpose here if not to remember shit??

Phone numbers that were strategically stored for every friend I've ever had, home, work, cell - all available at a moment's concentration, GONE!

I had to drive to fucking Roselawn today on my lunch hour to pay my property taxes because I set out the payment coupon LAST WEEK and then forgot to pay it. Repeatedly. As in every day. For a week. Can you see the problem here?

I can't remember that we're out of cat food unless I write a note and put it on my cell phone. Speaking of which...we're out of cat food...hang on...

Okay. Note written. I'm telling people I'll do things and then the moment I walk away, I've forgotten that I've said it. And then they call me and ask me if I've done such-and-such. And I lie, and tell them I have...even though I've completely spaced it...and then I do it RIGHT THEN. I need a person to follow me around with a notepad just to remind me what I've said. Maybe I should just buy a little tape recorder and record any and all conversations I've had in my day. Maybe I should be like that guy on Memento and start writing everything on my arms and legs in pen.

Last night when I came home, I was supposed to create and print a flyer about cub scout fishing trip. I was talking about it half the night at the concession stand. Did I create said flyer? Ummmmm, no. I did watch House and then my recorded Idol...and then I tried to remember what it was I wanted to do to no avail. I thought I remembered once...and went upstairs to do it. And by the time I got upstairs to do whatever it was I'd remembered...I forgot why I went upstairs. Seriously. It's a problem.

Is it the diet coke? Because I've been drastically cutting down my intake to one or two per day. Trying to drink more water to lube up my ... muscles you perverts. Geez. When you have the muscular shoulder problem I'm having you do not want to dehydrate yourself, that's for sure.

Do I need some ginko biloba or whatever the hell it is to boost my memory? Do I have adult attention deficit disorder? Is it...gasp...my age? I'm only 35 for crap's sake...memory loss doesn't kick in now does it? Oy.

Laura told me today that working the sudoku puzzles is supposed to be an exercise in memory work. Really? Because I find them an exercise in maddening uncontrollable frustration. You see I've graduated to the insanely hard puzzles...the key word here being INSANE. Which is what they're making me. So I had to give them up for awhile. I'm in a 12-step program for it. It's cool. I've forgiven myself. See how far I've come?

Batteries...milk...lettuce...